"What's that?" he asked.

She explained to him what sex was and he said "Oh I use a hole in the trunk of a tree".

Horrified, she said, "Tarzan you have it all wrong but I will show you how to do it properly". She took off her clothes, laid down on the ground and spread her legs wide. "Here," she said, "You must put it in here".

Tarzan removed his loincloth, stepped closer and then gave her an almighty kick in the crotch. Jane rolled around in agony. Eventually she managed to gasp,

"What the hell did you do that for?"